If I Had My Way

Instead

If I had my way…I would get to watch you play hardball tonight and cheer you on
Instead, I’m learning to be a girlfriend to the girl next door which is important too.

We would have as much fun fixing dinner together as sharing dinner while playing footsie
Instead, I’m getting to have dinner with my mom and I never know when that last meal will be… so I’m treasuring the moments I get with her.

I would get to fall asleep touching you and wake you up with a kiss every morning
Instead, I’m learning to be ok sleeping naked all alone (and sometimes with my dog)

I would make time stand still when we are together and speed up when we are apart
Instead, I’m learning to make the most of every waking moment… with or without you… although you are always in my heart and my thoughts.  Still, it’s never enough.